


wouldn't want anyone else

by noblegases



Category: Mass Effect
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-14
Updated: 2016-09-14
Packaged: 2018-08-14 22:59:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8032357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noblegases/pseuds/noblegases
Summary: this is a very small one shot i wrote and im gonna save to here. anyway i dont like capitalization and shepard is angry shes alive.





	wouldn't want anyone else

the SR-2, to be completely honest, never felt like home. she should’ve been grateful for it, for everything cerberus did, but everything felt like cold metal and hard edges on that ship. nothing felt right.

it was nice to have joker and chakwas there. miranda and jacob were welcome additions, lord knows she couldn’t go around without backup. but they were still unknown variables. they couldn’t be trusted, at least not at the beginning. they didn’t know her. not like joker does, not like anyone from the original crew. the bonds from fighting sovereign together, from staring what had to be death head on, … sitting with miranda and jacob didn’t feel the same.

she stood stiff beside joker as they made their way to omega. “i feel bad for the poor bastards you’re gonna reel into this mission, commander.” they had been quiet, maybe he was just trying to lighten the mood. shepard chuckled as she itched at the uncomfortable cerberus attire. joker was at least happy about his comfortable chair.

she stepped foot onto omega and sighed. this was it. time to be the hero again. time to recruit people to an unsurvivable cause. this one seemed even more bleak than the fight against sovereign. what kind of person would join up with the hero who died two years ago?

shepard wasn’t really sure what kind of joke the universe was pulling on her. she patted some blue blood off of her friends face and laid down on the med bay bed next to his. she told herself that she wasn’t going to see anyone from the old crew…. cerberus had made it clear that they had all moved on. she wasn’t going to contact kaidan - she wasn’t sure what she’d say. hi, i can come back from the dead. she feels like she’s disrespecting ashley just from breathing.

but really, she’s … thankful. to have an old face around (though she wonders if theres a connection to his new scarring and her new presence), it brings up her morale. who even knows if he’ll stay with her on this hell mission, but she’s praying that he will. she wouldn’t want anyone else with her.

he’s colder than she remembers. he’s almost as cold as the metal of the unfamiliar ship when she talks to him in the battery a few days later. it’s amazing how different he is. shepard thinks about him, who he used to be. she calls him a starry-eyed c-sec officer. she can’t tell if he thought it was funny.

she’s bothered by how much of herself she sees in him. he’s bitter now. she is too. she’s angry that they let shepard die in vain, that they sweeped everything she lived and died Justin to be swept under the rug like the reapers never happened. maybe it was a good thing that she was brought back from the dead. but she doesn’t want to think about the reapers. she doesn’t even want to think about the collectors. she almost misses when it was just about a seemingly rogue spectre and some geth.

she asks him if he’ll stay with her, if he’ll fight the unknown enemy with her, if he’ll go will go to what seems like death by her side. she thinks they both hope that maybe that’s exactly what it’ll be, that she’ll die like she was meant to - like he was too. he gives her a dry laugh. “well, commander, doesn’t look like anyone else is calibrating these guns. look like i have to stick around." he looks smug, if a turian can.

the following days, the ship doesn’t feel as cold. she doesn’t see rough edges as much as she did; it doesn’t seem as dim as it used to be. she sat in the mess with her crew, watching as mordin pulled another cerberus camera out of the wall. the ship little by little starts to feel like a home, maybe. it’s starting to become her crew as compared to one for cerberus.


End file.
